Author Archive
Angela the Vampire Slayer…or really anyone in a rubber suit (they can’t all be TBI)
Posted by: | CommentsOkay, I’ve decided everything should be somewhere between Land of the Lost (yes the original series, and yes the one with Chaka, whatever happened to that actor Philip Paley…he made it all the way to Airwolf. Keep in mind I have no reason to lie.), early to late Dr. Who up through Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
WTF, you ask. That’s a fair question.
Well any disease, bad guy/gal, universal deathly gloop, monster, demon,(the last three are simply known as different incarnations of the GOP of late) could be destroyed by attacking the actor in the rubber suit. And no, the suit was not used for protection.
I figure just about all those rubber suit baddies were some rendition of cancer, autism, heart attacks, strokes, brain injuries, broken bones, any physiological or psychological condition put in some rubber suit form. And through those shows we could kill them all.
Except for Chaka, even though we wanted to kill him at the time…really he is the precursor to JarJar Binks in annoyance value, just not as racist since he was blonde.
I figure,, that’s one of the reasons at least some of you know what I’m talking about.
We can’t cure cancer…though we might have cured AIDS for those who keep up with science news that tops 2011. All that stem cell research everyone gets whiney about…it really can save lives. You know, if we let people like scientists use it. I’m not talking about monkeys typing out Hamlet . I’m talking scientists.
I know I’m ready to run out and have an abortion just so they can harvest those cells. (Some people actually believe this, if you are one of them stop reading this blog and run directly into traffic…do not pass Go…do not collect $200. A straight header. I mean, if you believe stem cell research will increase abortions, you will probably believe me.)
I will let you know if I get sued because the last thing some good samaritan woman read was my blog and ran directly into traffic. I might even be a little proud.
You have to have some writing prowess to be writing about nonsensical rubber suits related to diseases, and still get someone to jump in front of traffic to help save the human evolutionary process…shit…take your kids too. Damn. Bet that was too late. Orphaned children all over the world will hate TBI writers everywhere for forcing people to think or die.
Man, I wish that were a prerequisite to life.
Think or die.
Might be my new motto.
Everything I wanted to know I learned in Star Trek: TBI Geek Day
Posted by: | CommentsOkay ever since second grade when Noah’s Ark destroyed my religious faith: God killing all those bunnies and puppies and babies born that day…yes, after that I thought God was mean as was subsequently sent to the principals office.
I had to find a utopian replacement for Santa Clause, God, and this Jesus fellow I was now suspect of being the Son of the baby, bunny, puppy killer.
There it was on my TV with my eyes a glaze. Okay it was an American utopia, but a utopia nonetheless. I was way too young to notice William Shatner, couldn’t and never could act. Not to kind to his fan base either, I found out later, but it didn’t condemn him to the puppy killer of my previous icons.
Every weekday I would sit mesmorized in front of the TV for an hour…it was better than Sunday football ahhhh…Roger Stauback…Billy Bates…but those days are gone. I can; however, watch Star Trek streaming on Netflix, but I know it will not live up to my childhood memory. On a nuch less cool level I watch the A-team and Knight Rider. NEVER watch those in rerun. You will realize how bad your taste was. Ehhhch.
I was by no means a TV watcher: Star Trek and football were my staples. There were all these incredible things. I watched my first interracial black and white kiss ever on TV, and you knew from that moment it was okay, because it was Capt. Kirk and Uhara.
(Sorry I grew up in the south we didn’t talk about such things. Completely taboo.)
I mean who didn’t want to kiss Uhara? I sure did. Eh, probably makes a little more since, since I turned out to be a lesbian, but she was hot as hell.
Here are all these Americans with strange put on accents flying about space saving planets and people; but we had our evil nemesis too–the Klingons and the Romulans and later series gave us the Borg ( I still get goosebumps).
We were never quite certain why they were bad with their grease paint and pointy ears, but someone had to be the bad guy.
Good vs. evil in the universe where we always wanted good to triumph (our–American space voyages who happened to have fake accents and pointy ears). It usually did, but sometimes life doesn’t allow only good things to happen to good people. I mean everyone in a red shirt that wasn’t Scotty was doomed to die before the second commercial. It was okay though. They would be back on set for the next episode.
The sadder ones were like City on the Edge of Forever where Kirk fell in love with a girl from the past who had to die even though she was a great person, and her ideas were ahead of her time. Yes, by God, I still know the names of the episodes without looking them up. (Amok Time was my favorite.)
Why was Star Trek so popular? Why is Star Wars so popular? Why is Jesus to popular? (I still question Santa Claus and think he had ulterior motives. This whole Ho-Ho-Ho and children come sit on my lap was always a little suspect to me.
Kirk, Spock, Dr. McCoy, Luke Skywalker, Harrison Ford (and of course) Carrie Fisher; These were the right guys doing the right things at the right times, win or lose. We knew they would fight to the end not only for each other, but for us too. It was all so clear, we just needed to be gallant, courageous, with the right touch of temperament, and do everything to save our friends at any cost. We had to be loyal, trusting those that in charge would save us all.
They usually did.
But just like Santa, Jesus, and God, none of them prepared us for the unfairness of real life. I sometimes go back to my dreams of utopia where I thought everything could be fair. It was before God turned mean, Santa Claus wasn’t real, which left my little girl mind a bit confused about this whole Jesus thing.
Star Trek didn’t prepare it for us either, but at least we had reruns and could pretend. Reruns of the Old Testament. What a drag. New Testament doesn’t exactly leave one all warm and fuzzy either…well perhaps warm.
Why were there so many Star Treks and they are still making them. We want that utopia in our future, we want it for our kids, and we want it for ourselves.
And some
Angela Gant tirades on Religion
Posted by: | CommentsThis is a cobbled together response I had to the following:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IAhDGYlpqY the video that went Viral about Loving Jesus and hating the chruch
http://theamericanjesus.net/?p=4970 an idiots response. I read it. Super boring.
BTW you can read this blog without going to either website, though the first one is four minutes and I think worth your time.
Okay, now I’m going to say something. In the 600′s I believe 633 CE the Catholic church took out the teaching that Christ did not believe you needed the church to go to heaven.
He never refers to Himself as the Son of God except in one version of the Bible, anywhere. How can anyone forgive a religion that started the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, and the burning of witches (who btw weren’t witches)?
Historical account range widely to from 500,000 to 9 million people were burned in Europe. Wide ranging statistic; however, there weren’t a whole lot of people populating the earth at that time. There’s always the Spanish Inquisition…oh and didn’t we kill4 million native americans for being on our land before we got here because they were heathens and savages.
Yes, back when archbishops were keeping whores you could buy your dead family’s way into heaven, Think I’m wrong pick up a history book. All of Christianity comes as off shoots of the Catholic church. Think of that when you tithe your 10 percent that you probably can’t afford.
Why are churches constantly raising money for bigger buildings, or play rooms. They enjoy their 501ce status and don’t pay a dime in taxes. Ever been to a megachurch? That’s a complete waste of time and money. Find Jesus on your own. You have a manmade book that may not be accurate at all, but Jesus was a pretty amazing guy, and I don’t think He had anything bad to say about anyone or wished anyone harm for any reason. Can you say the same for every church service you’ve attended?
I think of Him as more of an amalgamation of preachers at the time. The Church didn’t vote to make him the Son of God until the 4th century ie He wasn’t a shoe in, And He almost loss. I always wondered who was the back up guy.
Jesus and the New Testament have alot of nice, if not completely conflicting and unfounded stories. What does it matter who exactly said it. I mean the who “let thee who is without sin cast the stone ” was inserted in the Renaissance, I believe. It certainly wasn’t from the original material, but there’s no way I would argue that because it makes the religion more tolerant. The character of Jesus, The Buddhas, who cares who gets it attributed to.
Just like under God was added in the 1950′s to the pledge of alliance and In God We trust was added to our money. Our forefathers never intended us to be a Christian state most were Deists and a few Atheists.
All religion reads the same no matter what. Be a good person, you will have a good life or afterlife, be bad and you will be punished. People excusing the mentally ill know right from wrong. I know Atheists that lead better lives than people who claim to be Christian (but so what, you may know the inverse).
And if you want to know what destroyed my faith, 2nd grade Bible class, and the story of Noah’s arc ( I couldn’t get over that that God flooded and killed the whole world killing all the bunnies, puppies and babies, even if they were born that day how could they have committed to sin and all be sent to hell? Yes, children think too.
(This is innocent inquisitive very, very, shy Angela who believed very much, and did not want “God to be mean” ). Of course I was sent to the principals office.
That got me to researching(not in 2nd grade that much,nbut I would continue to educate myself in my adult years in theolory. The Bible was put together between 50-300 CE. That’s like me writing about the early 1800′s with no internet, libraries, and my source of information is primarily world of mouth from people who didn’t live that long. We’ve all played the telephone game.
I think too many people in this world are just handed down religion from the elders. People never question it. They should. Everyone should decide what they believe based on faith and empirical evidence if possible. The churches might be overflowing then with Christians, Catholics, Taoists, Buddhists, Islamic or Zoroasterism for all I know.
Signed your favorite TBI writer.
Welcome to my current state TBI and High
Posted by: | CommentsOkay, unless I got a whole lot dumber in the past two weeks, somethings up. I was talking to one of my counselors…talking might be to strong a word…garbledy gooking at or near the person in question. I walked into my appointment and he asked if I was high. Well since I wasn’t high this was not a good beginning to the conversation.
My brain muddled through pancake mix (for some reason I always pick breakfast food for brain muddlement) as I tried to answer questions put to me, or even remember the question asked of me. I’ve been seeing this guy for a few months, so he’s got a pretty good baseline on me…meaning I’m not usually thinking through molasses. He’s like, “Hey your over-medicated.” I’m like, no shit Sherlock (btw non- sequitar throwing it out there: new Sherlock movie even better than the last).
I went from trying to keep my blogs down to 500 words, and no matter what I do I end up clocking at over 700 no matter what I do.
Right now I’m struggling to hit 200. Unless you can backslide on brain damage, which by the way, I really can’t unless I give working on anything and sit drewling over I Dream of Genie reruns (that one was always a brain drain).
Or maybe pull out those stupid cars that you rub on the carpet so they go real fast, but will NEVER go through the track loop no matter what you do. I still want to know how they got that slinky to go down all those stairs.
Hmmm childhood issues I should probably let go of.
Think I’ll report on the syrup tomorrow…I’m praying for a light heated syrup day. Maybe I won’t right this blog like I’m high. Then again, maybe I will.
What the hell are you up to, Angela Gant
Posted by: | CommentsWell I’m sitting here on my couch with my favorite director, Hugh Richard Massey III.
Quite unexpectedly we got a free location in NYC to shoot, So this Guy Walks Into Bar.
So we got to shoot a short film, in a Bar, The BLVD, for free. Free in NYC. Off the hook. Of course I wrote this before the brain damage. Since the brain damage, I’ve written these blogs. That’s right, I’ve been able to write in a public forum for weeks now.
Saturday we are shooting Richard’s utube brain child Awesome on Saturday. As soon as they are available on youtube I will provide links.
Since my attack:
I’m still waiting to get over my Traumatic Brain Injury and all the fixings that go with it.
Honestly, I miss being able to write academically, write plays, screenplays, and novels. Hopefully I’ll get it back and be able to finish my Ph.D.
I’m keeping it short and sweet. Up way past my bedtime.
For now the trail is set for Jan.24, 2012.
Ingredients for sleep- TBI style
Posted by: | CommentsOkay, short post. I am on my iPhone.
I actually slept last night.
I have discovered the ingediants to getting sleep for a night:
Don’t/can’t sleep got more than 3 or 4 hours for over a week.
Have 12 hours worth of panic attacks for complete exhaustion.
3 dunkin dunuts of your choice (it’s the secret ingredient they don’t tell u about).
Mix on high speed for a week.
Pinch of salt (even if u just throw it over your shoulder for luck)
Use excessive language in your last post because u r at the end of ur rope, leash, or other kinky apparatus if applicable.
Bed and pillows r a bonus, but sleeping from complete exhaustion does not even require a horizontal surface.
Purree.
And u will remember nothing.
SLEEP.
(driver used on a closed course)- I say this alot because it amuses me.
As does prognosticate. Just cause its a fun word and u can impress ur friends if u become a Soothsayer.
Wanna know how I got a TBI
Posted by: | CommentsWhat the hell are you looking at? TBI. TBI your mama, fucker.
Posted by: | CommentsWhat the hell are you looking at? TBI. TBI your mama. ”my mom’s dead”. It’s cheap, but it’s always a good way to win a your mama joke. You actually get extra points if your mother is actually dead, but who’s counting?
Okay, here we begin the stare down. Most TBI’s that are mild look and can pass for normal (at least on first glance), some moderates too, serious TBI’s you’ve got bigger worries, and if you could give a shit, you wouldn’t.
People like to talk about how serious your TBI is, you are categorized by your three levels of fuckupedness: mild, moderate, and severe (usually by how long you were unconscious) Not actually an accurate measuring stick IMO, but whatever.
On a mild TBI: Defined as the result of the forceful motion of the head or impact causing a brief change in mental status (confusion, disorientation or loss of memory) or loss of consciousness for less than 30 minutes. In other words it will fuck up your relationship with your friends, family, coworkers (if you delude yourself that your going back to work for a short time) and yourself, and it will piss you off.
It’s kind of like trying to think of Cream of Wheat. The unsweetened kind. Just bland glop.
I have no idea why I always associate TBI’s with breakfast foods, but if your more of a lunch person you can always write more of a midday thinking through pastrami blog, though or a thinly sliced lunch meat of your chose is probably more accurate. (ABSOLUTELY NO HEAD CHEESE- that stuff is gross and cannot be used in my comparison. I’d rather you go with deviled ham or potted meat if you must.)
Keep in mind.
That’s a mild one.
And really. You’re probably more fucked up than just that. You’ve lost social skills, reasoning ability, sometimes the ability to make any sort of decision at all…but that can still be mild. Kiss off that executive function of the brain (you know the one you never knew what it did anyway); it doesn’t matter because it’s offline anyway.
Here’s something they don’t tell you, you moderates and milds. A great deal of the time, you are just as smart as you were when you level out after 6 months. Think of it as your CPU speed being affected.
Yes, there is shit you will relearn to do, but your brain’s still working…it’s just at half pace.
Now really, they say there’s a moderate, but it just means your not as fucked up as serious. I think they should just skip mild and go right to moderate or serious. When you do find moderate defined…it’s about the same as mild…maybe they make it sound a little worse, but really peeps can’t tell the difference.
it’s Bullshit. You are fucked up, my friend. And if you’ve read my previous posts, it’s a bitch to get over…
hmmm this is the swearing blog.
Like it.
Feel like I’m working off the union list, again.
Serious TBI and you’re beyond fucked. There really should be a catagory beyond fucked, and you won’t be reading this blog anyway, because you won’t be reading. For friends and family I offer you this: the brains plasticity is pretty fucking amazing. It’s a pretty amazing critter. You never know what it’s going to do, or how much your going to get back.
Are you going to get your loved one back the way they were?
No.
But that’s true no matter what level of TBI you’re at.
Your level of fuckupedness is your own to experience or not experience as you will.
Good luck to all.
Tomorrow the real fun one. Pulling the plug. I’ve had to do it myself. There’s a time to fight, a time to wait, and a time to let go.
And out of complete frustration, I’m just going to end this on fuck.
So fuck.
We are going to pretend for the moment that I am not a TBI.
People who had a tendency to have a temper beforehand, even if they learned to control it, are much more likely to suffer from TBI rage. Very few things are more terrifying than seeing a loved one go from zero to Chernobyl in less than a second. It’s like someone hit their fight or flight button, only it is stuck on fight.
When they pick fight, if you are in a home environment, you want to pick flight. I have heard and read some very strange stories about how TBI’s learn to control their rage. The only think that I have read that seems to work on a broader scale is when they “rage out”, many can “learn” to shut down in one way or another.
In public is the worst. Suddenly your 70 year old grandmother wants to beat the ass of an entire motorcycle gang for looking at her crosswise or making too much noise. As amusing as this my sound, try playing go between when grandma is a thirty-five year old man, who is out of control because his slice of pizza is a tad smaller than the others, and suddenly he wants to beat everyone into oblivion.
Two issues arise here. Grandma as a 35 year old man or a 70 year old woman are dead serious about what they want to do. You do not just have to worry about a loved one (who at this moment might be falling into a liked one catagory) being arrested, causing bodily harm to themselves or other, but they can put themselves in a situation to give themselves another head injury.
This just sucks.
There isn’t much you can do other than to duck and hope your voice will calm them down.
I wouldn’t recommend trying to restrain them, unless you can do so without harm to yourself. They may have no idea what is going on around them, or that it is YOU that is trying to restrain them.
Oh yes. I suffered from TBI rage. I scared the dickens out of my partner. I’m still not 100 percent certain what a dickens is, but I am absolutely certain she no longer has one.
It is an instant white hot or red rage. Luckily, every time this has been triggered in me I have somehow been lucky enough to avoid physical conflict.
Everyone is different, but you can’t spend your life avoiding the insane madness a raged out TBI can throw at you. There are medications that can help. I use a small service animal for just this occasion. A single woof from my dog, or a moment of sanity, can tell your TBI to shut down, walk away, etc and so on.
Is this difficult to achieve? Almost impossible for some (that’s why I recommend a GOOD psychiatrist) and a medication route if nothing else works. No, you’re loved one is not going to end up like Jack Nicholson in One Flew Over the Coo-Coos Nest. They will be fine, or you will find a different drug.
Some people don’t respond to drugs, or can learn to stop what I like to consider the fight or fight response on their own.
Fight or fight is not a typo.
That’s the way it rolls.
I’ve had to learn to walk away. It’s tough. I’m not the type to walk away, but I’ve learned over time…whatever the problem is is usually not that important. I might have even started it. Walk away. That’s my key. Drop everything and walk out of the grocery store if you have to…that ham steak will be there later.
You are going to have to work hand in hand with your TBI loved one to find a solution: medication, self-realization, a friendly woof, a sojurn to a voluntary institution for a week to cool your heels and figure it out, whatever. Your TBI cannot afford another head injury.
Rage is one of the first things you will have to work out, if your TBI is a rager.
Work it out before they work you out or someone else.
Luckily my rage is confined, and has always been confined to words. I’ve been five months rage free. No one is going to give you a chip for this, unless it’s in the form of a Tostido.
It’s one of the first steps to going back to try and lead a normal life if you’re a TBI.
If your a loved one of a TBI: it’s one of the first things that can make your TBI safe to be around, again.
Get help, because help isn’t going to come find you.
